Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Abby-at-her-blog. Or, the 7th Me.

Well, it's lunch. And that means I'm inhaling my meal so that I have time to blog away. Consider yourselves lucky, friends. Verrrry lucky.

Lately I've been thinking about why people are the way they are. I think this stemmed from a sort-of conversation with one of my friends from home who told me that he was surprised about some of the things I write on my blog because they're "deep." He quickly (and wisely) added to this by saying it wasn't that he didn't believe I could be a deep thinker, but rather that I just chose not to. Or something to that effect. We're going with this for the sake of the story here. Anyhow, I was mildly amused by this statement and wondered if I come off that way to a lot of people. Not dumb, really, but just one who doesn't take the time to think about the bigger implications of life. I guess it doesn't bother me if people think I do or not, I just think it's interesting to hear what perceptions people have of me. I suppose there are probably lots of different ones, which leads me to my point about context. I think everyone would agree that we often act differently around different groups of people. But do any of these selves match our true selves?

How do you really determine who you are? And does it even matter? I feel like I'm probably some sort of crazy combination of Abby-with-her-parents, Abby-with-her-grandparents, Abby-with-her-friends, Abby-with-Devin, and Abby-at-work. And maybe more! The possible Abby's are endless! (Scary, huh?) How much of each of these make up the whole me? I feel like I should make a pie chart now, but I'll refrain for the time being. And this doesn't even take into account the Abby-by-herself. Who I think is probably quite different than any of the aforementioned Abby's. If you ever have the blessed chance to observe me when I don't think you're looking, you may find some interesting things. I dance a LOT, often uncoordinatedly. I sing along to everything I hear, I can't help it. I make faces at myself in the mirror. I laugh out loud to the jokes I make in my head. I talk to myself (hopefully not enough to make it creepy.) I relax my posture (not that it's that great to begin with.) I'm honest with myself, brutally so. And I chat with God a lot.

Anyhow, I'm not really sure I have any concluding points about this topic, I just think it's really intriguing. Theoretically, how we act in every situation is totally under our control, but I don't think that's how it works in practice. It's way too easy to slip into the skin of whoever you've set yourself up to be for certain people. And that might not even be a bad thing, I just hope I can keep track of who I really am at the end of the day. I'm working on getting a good handle on it, and I hope you do too. Cheers, ya'll.

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