Excellent Boiled Potatoes.

Jane Austen is my Homegirl.

How does she do it? I've read Pride and Prejudice (only) twice, and am only beginning to dive into Emma, but I can't get enough of Ms. Austen's writing. I feel as though I may be a few years late to the party, but this will not stop me from giving a hearty shout-out to the lady who has become one of my literary heros. 

But in really analyzing what it is about Jane's (and yes we are close enough that I'm allowed to call her by her first name) books that I love so much, I realize that it was Pride and Prejudice  the movie  that actually sparked my love for Jane Austen. Have you ever seen the 2005 version with Kiera Knightly and Co.? You really should. I would literally watch that movie weekly if I had the time, and actually there have been weeks that I have watched it more than once. 

It is a comfort to me. The beautiful score immediately improves my mood, no matter what the mood is. The sun rising over the titles just makes me sigh deeply and I'm gone. I'm taken away, corny as that is, and I'm part of that world. I love the ball scenes when I can imagine myself making an idiot of myself dancing and drinking. I long to be Lizzy and Jane and Charlotte's friend. I so want to be in their club. I want to have sisters that annoy me but for whom I'd also walk miles in the mud to see. I admire Mr. Bennett's calm, sarcastic and then finally sweet mannerisms. I love Mary's secret love for Mr. Collins. I cheer every time Elizabeth "zings" Mr. Darcy at the ball that first time. I cry every time Mr. Bingley proposes to Jane, and I feel relieved when Darcy and Lizzy finally get over themselves and get together. God help me, I even find myself being endeared to that anxious Mrs. Bennett. 

The point is, I can recite this movie front to back, middle to finish, ten ways from Thursday. I know what to expect, I know how it ends, but I keep coming back for more. I also think it's extremely curious that in this case, my obsession is with a story that is told by film, although many people would argue that the book is a great deal different, and probably better. AND it's not even the ORIGINAL movie version. But I don't care. I think it's glorious. You can't help what you like, you know? 

And in my case, you can't help what you adore. 

I think my point here is that I am a huge supporter of whatever it is that you like. If you like a cover of Jason Mraz's cover of "Space Cowboy", do it. Like it. Love it. Whatever, you want, pals. Steve Miller doesn't mind and neither do I. Some things are so great that they need to be redone and revamped and re-shown and remade. It doesn't make the original any less important, or you any less important for loving the later versions. 

Thank you for going along with me on this little rant. I'm going to get back to P&P now. It's almost time for the "white" ball, and I love me some single-shot party scenes. 

Peace. Love. Re-makes. 

Bad, Bad, Bad.

Happy Spring, Sparkly Ones!  I'm hoping that these past few months have brought you all things good.

So, I'm here to bring you some perspective on something that not many people like to talk about: bad stuff. Yep. Negative, horrible, terrible, horrific, unfathomable, nasty, unbearable bad stuff.  Sounds like fun, right!?  

Well, I'm sorry. But here's the deal: it happens. It actually happens quite a lot, unfortunately, and I think we can handle it. Here's why: in my line of work I hear about some not only bad but disgusting things, and as of late, I've been witness to a couple of pretty traumatic events. Now, for confidentiality and legality's sake I'm not really allowed to disclose much about any of these things, which is fine... kind of.  I mean, what's the FIRST rule of trauma? TALK ABOUT IT! Oh, wait. Except if you're a social worker. If you're a social worker you should only talk to other equally traumatized people because that will give you the perspective you need. Sometimes social work ethics are about as effective as a jello sword. (Don't ask... it was just the first comparison that came to mind.)  

I just have to wonder if keeping these things to myself is really helping anything. I always tell my kids at work that they can trust me and come to me with anything, but that they shouldn't hold all the nasty stuff in because nasty stuff is not meant to keep. So, being that I am a fairly self-aware person (and I almost had a nervous break-down in November) I decided to start my own therapy in January and it's been a really great experience. In the words of my therapist: "If you're a therapist you need a therapist." And I do, I really needed a therapist. But sometimes our once a month appointments are not enough in the midst of all the muck and injustices. So! This is where things get... bad. 

And here it is, my perspective on bad: it is awful.  Groundbreaking, right? I know. That's why they pay me the big bucks. But here's something else: it's temporary, and it is the ever-important contrast to greatness, and in that way, I appreciate it. It makes me realize that good is extremely precious.

Now, before you go all "SHUT UP WITH THAT SILVER LINING CRAP, DEVIN!" may I just remind you that I am a professional problem solver, and I need to solve the problem of bad. I am compelled by something I can not label, touch, or diagnose to put an end to miserable feelings everywhere.  I need to rationalize these terrible things because if I can make sense of them, I can solve them. But it's a really, really, really, really hard job because most bad things are not rational, they're the opposite, actually. And on top of that, most people don't react rationally to bad stuff, they react emotionally, and wouldn't you know it? So do I. But I STILL have to solve it. I HAVE TO. Yes, I do realize that I will never fully solve "bad", but I sure as heck (censored for all you PG viewers out there),  can refuse to let bad take over. And here's how:

I can ask for help when I need it, which sometimes is often. Help is badness' kryptonite. The two can not exist for long in the same situation. I want to help you all, too, when the occasion arises. 

 I can try to be a little kinder than I have been, and those of you who know me well know that I am rather, shall we say, honest, in my opinions. You'd also  know that this will be tricky for me because kindness is a lot more difficult for me than sarcasm, but I'll give it a whirl. 

I can think before I act, and I can contribute only prepossessing works of all kinds to you all. (Or at least not careless works.)

Finally, I can remember to tell you how much I appreciate and love you. Without you, badness would surely take over and creep its way into my soul. Thank you, lovely people, for the supporting, joke-making, ice cream-getting, hug-giving, whine-listening, and checking-inning you do so often for me. 

TAKE HOME MESSAGE: Our powers combined = badness getting its tush drop-kicked to...well, I don't know. I can't specify a place because I don't want to wish bad on anyone. But the point is, bad's gonna lose. We win. Game over. 

Thanks for reading. Speak up, dive in, sparkle on.  You rock. 

Sparlke On!

This morning I ran across this video via Twitter and I had to post it. Whenever something that is only 3 minutes long almost brings me to tears I feel like it's time to share.

When this poster first started popping up around the internet, I really loved it. First of all, the typography is perfect, and that little crown is so Sparlke, Sparkle. It's hard to go wrong with a clean, simple graphic on top of a single bold color. No need to complicate things all the time. However, as it became overused and cliche, I got a little bit tired. Maybe there was a little hipster sitting on my shoulder saying, "Ugh, everyone likes that print? DON'T LIKE IT ANYMORE." At any rate, it really fell off my radar of images that I enjoyed because I really didn't think it meant much of anything.

But this video rekindled my love for the print. I didn't know it was originally a motivational wartime poster. I just figured it was some witty graphic designer who really hit the jackpot. Sometimes I think we tend to glamorize World War II by concentrating on the home front efforts (victory gardens = cute!), the great graphics of propaganda posters and of course, the fashion. (Because what would the WWII era be if it didn't include those A-line dresses made out of fantastic prints?) But it was still a war, and it was still horrifying, and it was very much a crisis that I don't think we can understand. The thing about this story that really resonates with me is that someone out there in history thought the best thing they could say was the simplest: Keep calm and carry on.

What can you do when the world is falling apart? Not a whole lot, sometimes. But we don't have to add to the chaos by freaking out and throwing in the towel. By now, I'm sure there are a ton of people (girls, mostly) who have gone through a breakup and seen that poster and thought "Yes. Tacking this up in my bedroom will be a daily reminder that I can survive this." And I don't want to trivialize things like breakups or any other personal problem, because I don't want to be a hypocrite. As someone conveniently said to me this morning, "You might be having a big crisis, or you might be having a small crisis, but it's still a crisis." Whatever thing is making you anxious or sad or tired may not seem legitimate to everyone, but if it's legitimate to you, then it means something. And in those moments, I think this poster is great advice. What can you do? You can start by taking control of yourself. Take a breath and do your day.

Whether your crisis is an international crisis or a 10-minute "I'm gonna be late!" crisis, it's usually best to keep calm and carry on. And if you really want to be an overachiever, you will Keep Calm and Sparkle On.

Things that are Surprising.

Here are some things that surprised me today:

1. I found an open wireless internet connection while sitting on the West Couch in my Grandparents' living room. I felt like this sort of occasion warranted a blog post. Also, I feel like I should never move. Until my battery dies, of course. Then I will be forced to risk it all and venture toward an outlet.

2. I just looked down at my finger and saw that I was bleeding! Not a lot, mind you, but don't you find those sorts of things to be odd? I never even felt anything! My skin must really be able to tolerate a lot of pain. (But don't test me, I cry easy.)

That's all! These are not really life insights, but I can't be revelatory all the time. Every once in a great while, I'm just an ordinary gal who finds non-password-protected wireless connections and nicks her finger. Who knew!

Passionize Your Life!

So, does anyone know the phone number or email address to the US Patent Office? Because I've got a really great idea for a new word. Or maybe I just have to tweet at Webster's Dictionary (surely they're on Twitter, right?) Either way, I'm claiming rights to my new addition to the lexicon: Passionize! It's not a word already, and I know that because, well, I just do, and also there is a little red dotted line under it as I type this. Ergo, I have invented it! It came to me a couple nights ago as I was falling asleep and I thought, "I gotta get that on the blog." Then I proceeded to have a dream about a being on a bus driving through the mountains and flipping upside down. Clearly, my subconscious isn't on board yet.

But my regular conscious is, and here's why. How many times have you heard a depressing statistic about our generation and how hard it is to find a job? Or how many of us are still living with/dependent on our parents? Or, even worse, how we're little whiners because we refuse to work at McDonald's? Yeah, we've seen this recession spun in every single angle possible. And it all either ends up looking gloomy for us for the next decade, or we end up being criticized because we've been taught to have high goals and get upset when we can't reach them. But what we haven't heard about yet is that while this is all going on, we can still passionize our lives.

I'm definitely not going to sit here and preach about only settling for your dream job, because frankly, that's just not realistic for most of us. But believe it or not, your job is not your life. Neither is your relationship (or lack thereof.) Neither are your hobbies, the social media you're addicted to, or the shenanigans you get up to on the weekends. None of these things in and of itself is going to fulfill you and complete you. They're all part of a whole life you've got. And when you feel gloomy about the next ten years of interning because that's the best thing you can find (or any of those other life components), you've got to passionize something.

I guess I should explain: Passionize = Passion + Energy. They're sort of the same thing, but not exactly. I don't really want to get annoying and just talk semantics here, but the whole idea is that whatever you put your energy into should make you feel passionate. And whatever makes you feel passionate should fill you with energy. I know I spend so much of my day doing things that I'm not passionate about and that drain me of all the energy I have. I'm not even doing hard work! Like, if I were lifting bricks all day and carrying them for miles, I'd have a legitimate reason to be tired at the end of the day. Instead, I have a pretty decent part-time administrative position, I teach a class, take a class, etc. None of these things is physically draining, and yet I've found that I'm always so tired. I need to passionize my life! Or a little part of it, at least. I need to find something that makes me excited, that I look forward to, that I feel strongly (passionately!) about.

I'm not sure what that thing is yet. I just invented this word two days ago, so it might take me a while to brainstorm. But I hope that if you're feeling like I do, you can find some way to passionize your life too. I think it's imperative that we do. How else are we going to survive 10 years of working our way out of a recession? Yeah, we've got to do things we might not want to do, but let's balance that out with doing something that we love to do. I think we could all end up being happier. And happy people tend to be nicer to each other, and nicer people don't take advantage of one another... see where I'm going/wildly extrapolating?

Bottom line, whether you want to use my word or not (and you certainly may), figure out what makes you tick, and get after it. And if all else fails, maybe we can make "Passionize" the next new Snapple drink. Sparlke, sparkle on!

2012!? How did that happen??

Remember when the Millenium happened? Yeah, well, I hate to burst your bubble but that was over a DECADE ago! To all of you who feel like time has started going much faster than normal - I agree. It's a little freakish, honestly. It's already been 2 years (almost) since I graduated college and nearly a QUARTER OF A CENTURY SINCE I WAS BORN! Where does the time go? Seriously, though. Where does it go? Another dimension? Here's looking at you, Stephen Hawking.

Anyhow. It's about halfway through January so it's about time I do my 2011 summary, as if any of you actually care about what happened during 2011. But if you do, or you're bored, read on...

January: You know, this was so long ago, I don't even remember anything that happened. I'm guessing I was cold.

February: I started hanging out with some new Concordia natives, and let me just tell you, it was one of the best things that happened to me during 2011. These people are hilarious and supportive and they let me invade their group of friends and settle in as if I had been there for a long time. Basically, I'm eternally grateful that they didn't judge me for being an outsider and accepted me even when I'm sure I scared them with my frightening personality.

March: Girls' reunion in Chicago! At least I think this happened in March. It was awesome to get back together with gals from Valpo and shop and talk and eat and drink and do everything that you do when you're with your best friends. Plus it numbed that not-in-college-anymore pain for a couple of days.

April: Hmm... let's see. April. I got nothing, to be honest.

May: Finally! A month I can remember! My 23rd birthday occurred during this blessed month. At work, we got started on the biggest project I've been involved in so far - three giant mosaic sculptures for a prayer garden. Not that I was so much a part of the fabrication, but it pretty much consumed my entire summer in one way or another.

June: Now June I DO remember. Probably because it was the most hectic month of 2011. I entertained my innermost hippie and spent four days covered in dirt at Bonnaroo (best. week. ever.) And then, because apparently I really love driving in a car, I drove back from Tennessee to Nebraska and hopped back in the car on the same day to drive to California. If you're considering driving from Tennessee to Nebraska to California in a 48 hour stretch, here's my advice: Don't. Just buck up the cash and fly. Or at least realize that if you try to do this in 48 hours, you will inevitably end up hating everyone around you regardless of whether you know them or not. At any rate, the CA trip went well (work-related, so there's only so much fun you can have) and June closed out with a rather exhausted Abby.

July: The month of weddings! Three to go to, two for which I sang. I really love weddings and these were no exception. Weddings are the perfect excuse for catching up with old friends, drinking to your heart's content and, of course, dancing. I just love to dance, even though I know I probably look like a moron.

August: Well, August was kind of a bummer as I started to say goodbye to all the new people I had met in the winter. I guess I can't blame them for getting real jobs in the real world that are not in Seward. But it was still sad and life in Nebraska started feeling a lot quieter again.

September/October/November: I'm bunching these together for several reasons. A) They sort of blurred together for me. B) I basically did the same thing the entire fall: work, coach volleyball, take an art history class at UNL, think about applying to grad school, entertain myself by watching reality TV on Friday nights. C) I'm sorta hungry and I want to wrap this up quickly.

December: And we're already at the end of the year! Whew! How did that happen? Maybe because I combined three months into one! Magic. Anyhow, the first half of December was marked by my frantic (yet ultimately successful!) attempt to submit my grad school apps and write my art history research paper while still working and getting a little Christmas shopping done. The second half of the month was much more lovely, with the return of those dear to me lost to the tundra of North Dakota and the merriment of family and Christmas cheer. And finally, the year 2011 ended on a high note, as I spent New Years with my best friend in the world and co-blogger, Deva (along with a few notable others).

So all in all, not much to complain about. Certainly 2011 was far superior to 2010. I'm hoping 2012 is even better, and I have a little inkling that it just might be. So cheers to your 2012. May it be exciting, happy, and full of sparlke, sparkle.

Merry Christmas to You and Your Favorite People!

Hello Sparlke, Sparkle devotees! (are there any of you left?) It's time for the traditionally cliche Christmas blog post! But that's ok. Certainly I can step away from my skeptical life outlook for this most sacred of holidays. At least for the duration of this post.

Today something very strange happened. I woke up, prompted by no alarm, at 8 am. If you know me at all, you know that I am perpetually sleepy. Like a sleep 12 hours and I'm ready for a nap type of gal. This is to say I literally can't remember the last time I willingly got out of bed before 11 on a Saturday. But today I woke up at 8. And I knew my parents were going to walk "up town" (ah, small town life) to get coffee, so I thought I'd be ambitious and join them. Along with us came my grandpa and my aunt and uncle. So we strolled through the cold winter sun to the local coffee shop and had our morning caffeine fix together. And it was wonderful.

I don't even regret missing out on my usual 3 extra hours of sleep. Now that I live 10 hours away from my parents, the mornings that I can spend leisurely chatting with them are so limited. I'm far past the teenage days where hanging out with my family was so Uncool. Now I actually like my parents, believe it or not. And as I sat back and listened to my family laughing and sharing stories at our morning get together, I felt pretty darn lucky.

I think I have the best family in the world. Do I expect you to think I have the best family in the world? Heck no. I hope you think YOU have the best family in the world. Because when we lose our jobs, when we break up with our significant others, when we move to a new town and know no one, our families are the constant in our lives. Mine will always be quirky and hilarious, but rooted in faith and intensely connected to each other. I would have them no other way. (Even when they start to drive me crazy.)

I hope that you get to spend time with your family this Christmas, whether it's the family you were born into or the family you've discovered along the way. And I hope you believe you're with the best people in the world.

Sparlke, Sparkle! Merry Christmas, all!